Saturday, March 29, 2008

A Nation of Whiners

Why can’t families today handle their lousy 1.8 children (or whatever the current joke-of-a-birthrate is)? This morning I’m driving 3 of my 11 kids to CCD (and a few neighbor kids) and I pass the local McDonalds. The drive-thru is 20 cars deep and cars are lined up on the road trying to get into the parking lot to get some of that oh-so nutritious food. Most of these are the so called soccer moms (and some dad’s too) running late, again, to their little darlings soccer and baseball games. They’ve got their honking-big SUV’s piled up waiting for egg Mc Muffins, hash browns and plastic Disney-Movie-of-the-Month crapola and 1 or 2 kids in the vehicles. If they are going to drive those monster cars they could at least have the guts (or stupidity – your call) to fill them up with kids. But seriously, how hard is it to get up and have breakfast before running around like madman (or is that madpersons ?) all morning. At this point of the day I had already been grocery shopping, gone to the gas station and 3 of the 11 kids were dressed (the clothes might even had matched), had eaten breakfast, teeth were brushed and they looked reasonably respectable.
I just love the parents of 1 or 2 kids complaining about this and that…they are so much work (have some more so they have someone to play with), it’s so expensive (take them out of the designer daycare, designer camps and designer clothes you hoser. Like I make a lot of money), I don’t have the patience that you do (PATIENCE!!! HA!!! Ask my saintly bride how patient I am. The microwave makes me angry because it takes too long).
So come on people. If a putz like me can handle my family (barely), y’all can handle yours.
End of rant. Remember people, we kid because we love.

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