Monday, October 20, 2008

Talk About Killer Boobs

FOUNTAIN, Colorado (AP) -- A Colorado teenager hired men to kill his mother so he could use her money to get breast implants for his girlfriend, police said.
Nikita Lee Weis, 18, was arrested on suspicion of conspiracy to commit first-degree murder, said Fountain Deputy Police Chief Mike Barnett.
Weis' mother, Hyun Weis, was attacked Thursday with a small wooden baseball bat at her home but escaped, authorities said. She was released Friday from a hospital.
His girlfriend, Sophia Nicole Alsept, and two men police said he hired, Juan Antonio Velez Gonzalez, 18, and Brandon Michael Soroka, 19, were also arrested on the charge of conspiracy to commit first-degree murder.
Barnett said Weis wanted to sell his mother's car and use money in her bank accounts to pay for breast implants for Alsept, 21.

Batting for Breasts. I've heard of batathons for different charities but this is taking it to the extreme.

Most guys like their women to have a nice figure. But killing someone for it?! Is it really worth facing life in prison? Couldn't they have dealt drugs like any other self-respecting scum-bag would have?

How does this conversation between boyfriend and girlfriend go?

GF – I wish I had a bigger chest

BF – Yeah me too. I mean I wish yours was bigger too, mines fine. Those 5 push-ups I do each morning are really helping out.

GF – But new boobs cost so much. It’s not like I’m Christine Applegate and have lots of money.

BF – I’ve got enough dough that I could pay for one, but then you’d be lopsided. Maybe we could wait for a buy one get one free sale like the grocery stores have.

GF – I don’t want to wait, I want them now. Hey my mom has a little bit of money saved and she’s got that ’97 Dodge Neon that’s pretty cool.

BF – So what. You want to steal her money and her car and sell it? We might get in trouble if she reported us.

GF – you’re right, let’s kill her instead and then I’ll inherit everything.

BF – cool that’s a much better plan. I know these guys I used to play baseball with who are looking for work….

And don’t worry about my MIL, she’s safe. I’m not going to go all ‘Babe Ruth’ on her with a bat. Sam is perfect just the way she is….

1 comment:

the Mom said...

Weird. I wrote about boobs this morning, too. Must be something in the air.

Obama is ahead in the polls, and that boob has us thinking about the real thing, I guess.