Bumpaholics? Women Addictided to Having Babies?

The Belly-Rubbing High
Are some women addicted to having babies?
By Martha Brockenbrough, Women's Health

It's not just in your head. There really is a bumper crop of baby bumps out there, from the famously fertile, like Heidi Klum, who's flirting with her fourth set of stretch marks in five years, to the infamous Nadya "Octomom" Suleman, who earlier this year bore eight babies at once even though she already had six other kids at home that she could barely afford to take care of.......

But it's not always quite so simple, psychologists say. Some women may like being pregnant a little too much, often driven to rapidly reproduce out of insecurity, a craving for attention, or feelings of abandonment by their own parents.

Having babies isn't addictive in the way that alcohol and narcotics can be. But bumpaholics feel compelled to procreate for many of the same reasons that substance abusers turn to booze or drugs


Um excuse me Rob, I hate to butt in here again, but why are you reading Women’s Health?

Hey I’m very interested in women’s health issues like; cancer of the tatas, menstrual cycles, crying for no apparent reason, abnormal pap smears, leg-waxing rash.......that’s just the sensitive kinda guy I am.

Bumpaholics? Nice made-up word, morons.

Is everything a psychological condition these days?

People shop too much they are Shopaholics, instead of financially irresponsible.

Or they shoplift all the time so they are kleptomaniacs instead of criminals.

They eat too much they are foodaholics, instead of fat slobs.

Can't stay away from hookers they are sexaholics, instead of perverts.

Yeah I know it’s not their fault. Their mommas didn't breastfeed them and their daddies spanked them and they didn't make the 1st grade t-ball team. Boo Hoo

Um, anyway back to this article. Sure maybe there are some women (the octomom comes to mind) who are a little whacked when it comes to having too many kids. But this article just has the smell of the typical anti-child liberal-BS (Sam won’t let me write bull$h!t on my blog, she’s worried I’ll be a bad influence on you) that we who dare to have more than 2 kids have to put up with. I got to admit this is a new angle. I guess they are tired of running the “Kids Cost too Much” or the “Earth is Full” or the “You Will Ruin Your Health if You Have More Kids” articles. Lather, Rise, Repeat...So I give them points for being novel at least.

Without casting aspersions on the author or the quack-shrinks she used in the story; why is it that I think they all have like 1.2 kids each, drive Volvo’s and drink skinny soy lattes from Starbucks? Ok well maybe I am casting aspersions but tough tootsie. None of us with large families are calling these people with small or no families Bumpophobes (hey they aren’t the only ones who can make up stupid words, I think I’ll patent that one) so please just leave us the hell alone. We don’t want your help, opinions or attention – people like the Duggars, Jon and Kate and Octomom to the contrary, we are not all attention-whores.

So what are the enemies’ next likely steps over the years?

1. Having Bumpaholism made an official psychiatric disorder
2. Offering counseling and therapy for women afflicted with this disorder
3. The big drug companies, who are in bed with the FDA anyway, will come out a pill to treat this ‘disorder’
4. For ‘extreme’ cases where counseling and drugs don’t stop these chronic breeders sterilization will be strongly ‘suggested’
5. Repeat offenders will be forcibly sterilized under Universal ObamaCare…for their own good of course

Or this could be a onetime article and I’m over blowing the whole thing…it could go either way