Thursday, September 18, 2008

I Hate the Color Lime

Isn’t that what color green and pink make? I think it is. I was never good at figuring that out in grade school. I was too busy eating paste or sticking erasers up my nose or trying not to get beat up during recess.

Any who, I now hate both of those colors. I cringe every time I see them on TV or in a magazine add Those colors now make me see red. It didn’t use to be so. I used to like pink and green. Heck I have a few pink shirts in the closet (I’ve got 11 kids so back off). Now I don’t know if I can ever wear them again. And every spring I have green grass for a few weeks before the kids destroy the yard.

Let me explain.

It’s this whole ‘let’s jump on the Green (environmental) and Pink (cancer) bandwagons’ that’s drive me nuts. Disclaimer: it’s not that I want people to get cancer or the earth to get trashed. Everyone wants a cure for cancer. We all have family and friends that have died from cancer.

Pink is everywhere. Pink football jerseys, major league baseball players using pink bats, Obama pledging to paint the White House pink if he wins, pink ribbons, pink t-shirts, pink Dell laptops, pink IPod and cell phone holders, there is even a whole line of pink running gear.

And the purchase of these Pink products helps cancer research, supposedly. How much of the actual purchase price actually goes to cancer research and what groups are getting the money? Are those groups doing legitimate research? Or are their research procedures and groups they grant money to, doing things contrary to Catholic Moral teachings? Like the Susan G Komen group (donors to Planned Parenthood and supports embryonic stem-cell research).

The final straw was an ad for Oakley sunglasses in my latest running magazine. Pink Oakley’s with a portion of the proceeds going to cancer research. Another “look at how great and caring our company is” advertisement.

The companies that are suddenly ‘Green’ are driving me crazy too. Maybe it’s good business but it just strikes me as self-serving and insincere. Is anyone falling for it? I’ll take some dirty unshaven hippy tree huggers over these corporate phonies any day. I expect it from hairy-legged, granola eating women in a VW bus. But not from Wal-Mart, Bank of America and IBM and every other company that is slapping green all over themselves and shouting it as loud as they can.

These companies put in a few solar panels and some Compact Fluorescent Light Bulbs and say look at how great we are. Ok maybe every little bit helps, and saving energy and money is a good thing. But this ‘look at how great we are attitude’ is nauseating. “Don’t let the left-hand now what the right-hand is doing”.

Man I should have bought stock in Green and Pink paint companies. I bet they are doing better than Lehman Brothers, AIG and Fannie Mae stock.

Well if you can’t beat them join them. I’m going to change the background of this blog to Pink and for every hit this site gets I’m going to donate a penny to the makers of the “Save the TaTa’s” bumper stickers. And in order to be Green I promise to never whack a baby seal in the head with a baseball bat unless the seal attacks first or tries to steal my running shoes. And I will never again eat Spotted Owl…they taste like chicken anyway…


momto5minnies said...

You should find out that information ... how much goes to the cause.

It seems everything is color coded. At Target they had a whole rubbermaid section with everything PINK. I don't necessarily want pink utensils.

Catherine said...

Profits. Benefits. PROFITS... Nothing is free or for good cause, nowadays.
And what do you think of all these VIP, million dollars stars that advice you on TV to give for this charity or that one? I mean like our most famous football player whose name now is a multinational company.